In my early twenties I had this really awesome belief going on. I believed that I was lucky. I believed that the universe was on my side. I believed that cool shit would just happen to me with very little effort on my part.
And then one day that all changed. I got dumped, and, just in general, adult responsibilities started to weigh heavy on me.
Without really noticing, my little heart fell into the very dark place of “why me?” That pity party eventually brought me to “I’m not lucky,” “My luck ran out,” and “Life is really hard for people like me.”
It happens, right? You start looking around at your friends and your damn Instagram feed and you start to believe that other people have it better than you.
Over the last few years, I’ve been doing my best to climb myself out of that place. Sure, we’ve all had our share of bad things happening to us: shitty parents, relationships that didn’t work out, unfair health issues, low-paying jobs, and just being born in the wrong clique.
I get it. But should we let those things define us? Just because it happened to us in the past, does this mean the rest of our lives are going to look this way?
In a weird way, this victim mentality probably helped us out at some point in life. I know for me, it helped ease my discomfort of being a middle child. My mom was a little harder on me, and if I pouted my lips the right way, my dad would feel really bad for me. In fact, a lot people other than my dad started to pity me.
Honestly, that little crutch helped excuse me from a lot of the shortcomings in my personality that I was ultimately responsible for. For example, I had a hard time sticking hard things out, because poor Nikki never had someone in her life telling her to stick things out. Feel bad for me.
Sadly, I brought this crutch with me to my marriage. I’ve been working on taking my business to the next level for about three years now. Every time I make a big move, I take a step back because I get scared. I’ll tell anybody who is watching that I can’t kick it up a notch because I don’t have any support when it comes childcare. Poor me doesn’t have a helpful abuela, like many of my friends, to pick up the slack with the kids. So that makes me stuck — and in other words, a victim.
I call bullshit on myself. And I hope you will too in the areas where you’re in a victim mentality.
The truth is God (the universe, whatever you believe in) wants us to be lucky. It wants to help us out. But we are powerful. We have the power of free will and choice. Starting with what we choose to believe in.
God cannot intervene and change your mind without your consent. What the universe can do is help you to see yourself in a different light with signs like this story.
Once we become aware of the choice of thought we’re holding on to and how it is deeply holding us back, we can ask for help from the heavens. We can ask for it to be taken from us, every time we find ourselves falling into its shadows.
Friends, we truly are powerful, luck-making beings. Is dream-catching easy work? Absolutely not. But the tools are within us — engraved in our souls. No one is holding us back. We just have to make the choice to see that truth.